Change

Listening to a great new song from Aaron Crider this morning- titled “Change” 

 

“in a world of sadness, you have shown me laughter.  Through the tears and madness, you have turned my night to day.  You are the Change that I believe in.  You are the life that I am free in.  You are the grace that heals my soul, You are the only hope I know.  You are the Change that I believe in”…. isn’t that great?

 

I am going to be a bit more transparent than I normally like to here.  I am really having a struggle with being back in the United States.  I have led a number of teams to “The developing world”,  Sri Lanka, Honduras, Dominican Republic, Ethiopia, and more… but Swaziland has touched me to the core.  Perhaps it is the relationships with the missionaries, the connection with the people(as they at least have a rudimentary ability to speak English and communicate with the likes of me(I am ignorant and am only able to effectively communicate in one language)), the sickness and disease that permeates their every fiber-yet they do not see it/recognize it(a generation missing, and 20% or more of the kids we played with have HIV, and will quite possibly not be on this earth in a few years)… I don’t know, but it certainly is a struggle here at home- looking at the junk I have purchased, wondering how much this and that would be worth if sold, and questioning yet again my place and purpose.

 

I do not desire to make rash decisions while feeling this kind of emotion, I know that He is continuing the refining process in my life, and I have been blessed to share something that I am so passionate about with others to get them involved in world missions-be it through sponsoring a child through Mission of Mercy, they themselves becoming missionaries on the front line, or just heightening awareness here at home of desperate need elsewheres.

 

I know that many of our recent team to Swaziland are experiencing similar thoughts and feelings.  The challenge to myself and anyone else struggling with this is simply:

 

1 Peter 1:7 These trials are only to test your faith, to show that it is strong and pure. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold--and your faith is far more precious to God than mere gold. So if your faith remains strong after being tried...

 

Good words indeed.  For now, I will make no rash decisions, and will truly try better to seek Him in the experience of this life He has given me.  Perhaps I have years left of taking groups overseas and meeting the call here at home through Christian radio-touching the lost in our own backyards… perhaps it is time to “GO”… regardless-I need to cling closer and chase after Christ.  In that will be the answer and timing of anything and everything.